23.10.12

Don't know what to feel....

23.10.12
I've been very confused these past few days, and I actually don't know what to feel. Are those things you uttered a couple of days ago already a hint? I hope not, because I would really be disappointed with myself for not being smart enough, with the decision I had made 3 months back. I've been very negative lately and it's not a good thing. I have to stick firmly to that decision though and it scares me, since I have no idea at all if what to expect and what would be the consequences of such action.

Having said that, there's still a part of me who still wants to remain optimistic and wants to believe that everything will turn out well in the end. This is really a hard thing to deal with. I'm upset and a bit hurt, and I don't know why I do need to feel this thing. Am I really into you already, and I'm just trying to deny it to myself? Having this kind of feeling is such so tough because I really don't know if the kind of thing that we have right now, is indeed for real. I do hope that you're not like those guys out there who aren't genuine enough, which I'm going to find out a few weeks from now. So I need to prepare myself, my mind and my heart to whatever outcome may be, and be strong enough to handle everything if this certain thing will cause so much pain. But nevertheless, I'm hoping for the best.

0 comments:

Post a Comment